Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Train of Thoughts.














Had problems sleeping last night, kept thinking about doing the post and wondering what nasty things were lurking there for my delight.

As soon as I started thinking I could not stop, nor could I sleep, shame you can’t stop as quickly and easily as you start.

Trying to stop thinking just seems to produce the opposite result, as thoughts came even thicker and faster.

As usual once I had started to think I could not stop my train of thoughts.

And it was just like a train, with many carriages, and just like my thoughts which came and went with speed, and there was no stopping me.

All that worrying for nothing, as it turned out there was nothing too unpleasant, just the usual burocratic mail, it is truly amazing how much post you get when you become disabled.

Glad the post had no nasty surprises in it today, funny how worried I was yesterday, so worried that it kept me awake until 3 am when I took a tablet.

The post and the telephone calls are slightly calmer now, then it was when I was first disabled, and then it seemed that I had got a whole new occupation.

Our phone bill was huge then, because there were so many calls to make on a daily basis, this is when I really needed my case manager to step into action.

She did not so I had to be my own case manager, luckily I have a new case manager now, and she is dynamic woman, who is very engaged with her work.

Good to have someone like that to look out for my interests and who seems to care about my welfare.

Today is another extremely cold day, the sun shone brightly; there are still strawberries on the plant outside the bedroom window.

Ten strawberries trying to turn red think that now we have had a frosty night like last night they will freeze and defrost and go mushy and eventually mouldy.

Tomorrow some friends may be around to visit us, looking forward to seeing them, in the afternoon after my physiotherapy session with the wonderful Mathilde.

Starting to feel relaxed now, step one to the tension fading was getting the post out of the way and step two was making the phone calls.

Step three will be getting my carer’s allowance sorted out on Friday, when a very good friend Anja is going to be visiting us, will help me.

Once Anja helps me to get the allowance sorted, all I need do then is send in the paperwork and that is the last bit of administration I need to do this year.

After that I can enjoy our wedding anniversary this Saturday 19 December, and the Winter Solstice on the 21 December.

And then there is Christmas next week Friday.

Happy days.

7 comments:

Yuki Bara said...

Lovely pictures, as always, Herrad. I'm sorry that you're having so much trouble sleeping... Don't let the mail get the best of you, dearest... It can be thrown out like anything else. I hope you're having a good week otherwise...

+Rei+

soulful sepulcher said...

Hi Herrad,

My mind goes that way and interrupts sleep at times too. Happy Anniversary, I bet you have some fun stories about that to share here with us! From what I know about you and Richie via reading, you are happy people who enjoy other's company and a good party!

Maybe Richie will make a favorite food that day.

hugs

A New Beginning said...

Hey Herrad you have a great blog.Loved my visit and would definately like to come again!!
Love and best wishes
Sana

Joseph Pulikotil said...

Hi Herrad:)

Greetings:)

Beautiful photos.

I agree with you that when a person tries to supprees the thoughts then it become almost impossible and thoughts come flooding into our mind. We just can't escape. What I do at such times is to pray and pray and pray and I fall asleep eventually. This many not work in your case. But this is what I do. I keep a rosary near my bedside which becomes handy.

Wish you happy wedding anniversary on Dec.19 and all the best for the numerous celebration that are to come. I hope and pray that you will be of good health to enjoy the festivities.

Best wishes Herrad:)
Joseph

Blinders Off said...

Wishing you an early

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY.

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh, I was like that last night...the train of thoughts just would not stop. The only way I know how to deal with that is to either start writing, typing or recording my thoughts, then turn the tv on to try to distract myself enough to fall asleep. Sorry you went through that!

Herrad said...

Hi Rei,
Thanks for coming by, good to see your comment.
Glad, you like the pictures.
After the mail was done, I could see there had been nothing scary, just my imagination.

Hi Stephany,
Thanks for coming by too, our minds can get overactive, usually when desperate for sleep.

Hi Sana,
Thanks for your visit, good to meet you, I too liked your blog and will visit often.

Hi Joseph,
Lovely to see your comment, thanks for coming by and leaving good wishes for tomorrow.

Hi Debra,
Thanks for your visit and good wishes.

Hi Rain,
Thanks for your visit, thoughts at the wrong time are hard to stop.
I used to get up to drink water, smoke a joint or read or write, now I can only lie here and hope it is morning quickly.

Thanks everyone for coming by and leaving comments.
Really appreciate it.
Love,
Herrad